Dark of Winter: A Between the Worlds novel Read online

  Well, at least I feel a little cooler now she thought. Her next instinct was to contact Jess and Bleidd but something held her back. Gods they must be frantic, but let me think for a minute. I mean at this point I can’t tell them anything except I’m in a room somewhere that smells like goat. No wait, something’s off here. She frowned trying to sort out what it was and after a while it occurred to her. Magic. I can feel the magic in the air. That’s not right. Even if I was close to the border…oh crap. I’m across the border, in Fairy. How the Hel did that happen? How long have I been out?

  She felt panic rising and throttled it down. Who would have kidnapped me and taken me into Fairy? In her mind’s eye she saw a flash from her last memory before waking, the snowy parking lot of her store and a familiar face, a young elf who came in to the store sometimes. Gods’ damn it! Sal you little shitweasel. You have some part in this. But why? Why? You’ve been coming into the store off and on since, what, last spring? Early summer? This makes no sense.

  She shifted again, trying to get more comfortable, and then squirmed around to a sitting position, stretching her feet out along the floor, since the mattress wasn’t on a bedframe. Even through her socks she could feel the rough wood and for a moment she slid her feet back and forth on the boards, working her toes over the wood. It was pointless but helped her feel more grounded. She could see fine in the dark room thanks to her elven heritage but being in a room without windows left her no clues to whether it was day or night. The space was fairly small, no more than seven feet by six feet with the door in the middle of the longer section. The bed, a narrow twin mattress, was wedged along the shorter section to the left of the door. I think this must have been some sort of storage room or closet Allie thought but she wasn’t entirely sure. Although for all I know this might be what spare rooms in Fairy are like for the Lesser Fey. That’s the only explanation for the smell and the rough feel. Everything in the clan houses that I remember growing up with mother weren’t like this. They were all smooth and polished and smelled like herbs, even the closets. Elves have such high standards even the lowest ranking ones wouldn’t put up with this. I don’t think.

  This thought only puzzled her more because she couldn’t imagine why Sal, an elf, would kidnap her and then she’d end up in what seemed to be a place of the Lesser Fey. Of course she still wasn’t sure why he’d kidnap her to begin with.

  Rolling her shoulders, frustrated, she decided she was tired of the darkness pressing in whether or not she could see in it. It was depressing. She drew on a little bit of the abundant energy around her and used the most basic magic all elven children knew, to call the tinesi, the fairy fire.

  Or tried to anyway.

  The energy came at her direction, but when she tried to shape the spell instead of going where it should have there was a low humming and a pulling sensation at her right wrist. The magic went there, like water draining from a punctured bottle and her spell died before she’d fully cast it. She lifted her bound wrists and stared mutely at her right coat sleeve, mystified.

  Then the door opened.

  **************************

  Jess had slept poorly after they had returned home early that morning. The Border Guard had found Allie’s car but no sign of Allie herself. The house they had seen the night before was indeed the location of an illegal crossing and this was proving both a help and a hindrance in their own search. By uncovering it they had put the Border Guard in their debt and the best way to repay that quickly was to get the location cleared and aid in the Elven Guards’ own investigation. The captain of the Border Guard however had already held a grudge against the captain of the Elven Guard and having his Guard shown up once again by his rivals was an embarrassment.

  Jess had talked at length with his counterpart among the Border Guard, Valeryien, when she had called to tell him they had found Allie’s car. She had been forthcoming with him in explaining the position she was in, having been ordered to both give the Elven Guard as much help as necessary to speed their investigation and also to be as thorough as possible with her own work. It put her in an untenable position and Jess sympathized with her dilemma. He had been very clear with her, to a degree that bordered on rudeness by elven standards, in explaining that they were not only looking for a member of the Elven Guard who had apparently been kidnapped, but that she was his wife and was pregnant. Valeryien had been horrified to learn that last detail, something that had not been passed on down the chain of command, and had promised to notify him as soon as the crossing itself had been cleared, even though that would be well before their investigation was closed. She felt this a fair compromise since the Elven Guards’ investigation wouldn’t need to directly cross the Border Guards’.

  Jess knew she was risking her Captain’s anger but guessed that she was betting he would back down when confronted with her knowledge of Allie’s situation; even he after all could not risk the political implications of slowing the Elven Guard down if it meant Allie and her unborn child died as a result. The entire dance of politics and compromise made his teeth ache. But he appreciated that Valeryien was being as accommodating as she was. When they spoke she had implied that the site should be cleared within the day.

  Until then there was nothing to do but wait.

  He walked slowly downstairs, glad that Jason was still sleeping after working a double shift last night. He was not looking forward to telling Allie’s heart-friend that she was missing, although he knew that it was an inevitable duty.

  His steps took him reflexively to the kitchen; he expected to find Bleidd drinking coffee or perhaps sitting and brooding since the other elf was not in their shared room. Instead he turned the corner and found him sitting at the kitchen table with an open beer in his hand. Jess tensed, taking in the scene: the dark-haired elf motionless with his head bowed, the can clutched between his hands. Jess took a deep breath scenting the air but although he could smell the beer the aroma wasn’t overwhelming. “What are you doing?”

  “Have you ever been in a situation Commander,” Bleidd said, his voice low, “where you know that you should not do a thing but you also know that the thing you should not do is the only thing that will make you feel better?”

  “Is this truly the only thing that you think would make you feel better?” Jess struggled not to simply knock the drink out of Bleidd’s hands, remembering the way he had been when the two had first met and the other elf was rarely sober. His decision to stop drinking had been entirely motivated by their early rivalry over Allie, but in the months since to Jess’s knowledge he had stayed sober. Jess much preferred him that way.

  “Isn’t it?” Bleidd asked, his voice hopeless. “We are sitting here doing nothing while she is out there, somewhere. We cannot even be sure that she is unharmed.”

  “They would not harm her,” Jess said stepping closer.

  “They did before. She will never walk without a limp because of the Dark Court and their damn obsession with that book,” he replied, shifting the can in his hands.

  “That was a different situation,” Jess said, desperately wishing he had Allie’s gift to sense people’s emotions. He did not know what to say to his lover right now to give him hope, when he was also struggling with the same weight of fear and despair. “Even the Dark Court-“

  “-won’t harm a pregnant woman,” Bleidd cut in, finishing the sentence for him. “I know. I know. But what if they will? What if they do?”

  “They won’t.” Jess repeated firmly. “You have been too long among humans my love if you are even worried about this-“

  Bleidd shook his head sharply, stopping Jess almost mid word, “What if we cannot find her Commander? What if they hold her until the child is born? What then?”

  “We will find her,” Jess said.

  Bleidd shook his head again lifting the beer. Jess stepped forward switching to mental communication. “I do not think this is wise.”

  “You are right,” Bleidd said out loud, taking a long drink, “it isn
’t. But I can’t bear this pain. Forgetting it even for a little while is better than wallowing in it.”

  Jess felt helpless, watching his spouse. He knew that Bleidd drank to excess when he drank, had seen him drunk once shortly after they had met and knew that he had spent most of the time he had been Outcast in such a state. But elves as a rule didn’t drink to get drunk and Jess had limited experience with such a thing among his own people. He didn’t know what to do now, what to say. So he watched mutely as Bleidd quickly finished the beer and got up to get another one.

  “Is this your solution? To drink yourself into oblivion?” he snapped as Bleidd opened a second beer and returned to the table.

  “Better oblivion than my imagination right now,” Bleidd muttered darkly. “And if you don’t like it then go. Leave me alone.”

  Jess winced, certain he’d said exactly the wrong thing. Shoulders slumping in resignation he went and sat down next to the other elf, the person he loved most in the world next to Allie. “I’ll stay.”

  Bleidd hesitated then shrugged, staring broodingly out the window at the backyard as he drank. Jess sat next to him silently.

  A half hour later Jason stumbled down, looking half awake. He froze in the doorway much as Jess had earlier, his dark eyes going wide as he took in the sight of Jess sitting morosely next to Bleidd, who was still drinking, a half dozen empty cans now arrayed on the table in front of him.

  “What the fuck?” Jason said, each word rising in pitch.

  “Hey Jason pull up a seat and grab a beer,” Bleidd said. “We’ll make it a party.”

  “What the fuck,” Jason repeated, his eyes darting between the two elves. “Have you lost your mind? Why are you guys in here drinking at 8 in the morning? Why the fuck are you drinking at all Bleidd?”

  “Screw it,” Bleidd mumbled.

  “I’m not drinking,” Jess said.

  “What?” Jason said. “You’re just sitting there watching him get wasted at breakfast? What is wrong with you guys?”

  Bleidd laughed his voice devoid of any humor. “Ever gotten your heart ripped out? Doesn’t feel good. Beer makes it hurt less.”

  “What? What is he talking about?”

  Jess winced, “Jason sit down.”

  “No,” Jason said, eyes narrowing. “What’s going on?”

  “Allie’s been kidnapped,” Bleidd said raising his beer then taking a long swig from it.

  “What!” Jason yelled, his voice echoing off the kitchen walls.

  Jess winced again, reaching up to rub his temple. “She was taken just outside her store last night.”

  Jason managed the few steps over to the table and sat down hard in one of the chairs. He whispered, “Is she okay?”

  “We don’t know.”

  “But you…I mean can’t you ask her? Talk to her in your heads?” he looked from one to the other, Bleidd ignoring him and working on a seventh beer.

  “We think she is unconscious, although she is definitely still alive,” Jess said, trying to be as gentle as he could with the news.

  Without warning Jason’s hand darted out and grabbed the beer can from Bleidd, some of the liquid sloshing out of the opening. Bleidd tried to grab it back but Jason leapt up and back shoving his chair between them. The elf glared at him. “Give it back Jason.”

  “Fuck you Bleidd,” Jason said, crossing to the sink and pouring the beer out.

  “Hey!” Bleidd said, getting to his feet.

  “Why are you doing this? Allie’s missing and your solution is to get shit faced? Really?” Jason’s anger was palpable as he spoke.

  “Well there isn’t anything to do now is there?” Bleidd said, his own words sharp enough to etch glass. “They took her into Fairy and thanks to bullshit red tape we have to sit here and wait for permission to follow. So yeah I’d rather get drunk. I’ve spent all night being sober and suffering and I’ve had enough of it, thanks.”

  Jess reached up and took his partner’s hand, not knowing what else to do. For a moment he was afraid Bleidd would push him away, but he didn’t, instead gripping his hand so hard it hurt. Jess didn’t care. He’d rather have bruises than see the other elf hurting himself like this.

  Jason took a deep breath, his hands balled into fists. “Great plan. When you do get permission to go into Fairy then what? Jessilaen drags your drunk ass with him? Or he just leaves you here to sleep it off and you wake up tomorrow alone and realize how stupid you’re being?”

  Bleidd inhaled sharply, furious, “Don’t speak to me of stupidity. Your life isn’t so much better is it Jason? Whose bed was your boyfriend in last night while you were working?”

  “Bleidd,” Jess said sharply, afraid that he would say something unforgivable to his friend.

  “His own, alone for your information,” Jason said, his eyes flat. “And this isn’t about me. This is about you. Don’t do this Bleidd. Just don’t. Don’t throw away almost a year of sobriety because things are bad right now. It isn’t making anything better, and if Allie really needs you right now then she needs you fucking sober and ready to help her at any minute. Not acting like this.”

  Bleidd looked away, the muscles of his jaw working. Finally, softly, he said, “The sober ship has sailed hasn’t it? I don’t know what else to do. I can’t…I don’t know how else to not feel this way.”

  “Bleidd,” Jason said, but trailed off, looking uncertainly at Jess. Jess looked up at Bleidd, feeling the tension filling him through their linked hands. A moment later Bleidd let his hand go and strode quickly out of the room.

  Jason started to follow, but Jess stood and stopped him, “Don’t. I’ll go with him.”

  Jason glared at him, his eyes accusing. “You should never have let him drink anything to begin with.”

  “It’s not for me to let him or not let him do anything,” Jess said sadly. “He has to decide for himself what he wants to do when it comes to this.”

  Jason’s glare followed him out into the hallway, but Jess ignored him. All of his attention now was on Bleidd, who had gone up to their room. He didn’t think this was anything he could fix. All he could do was what he had been doing, be there for his lover while he struggled with the weight of his emotions and his desire to avoid feeling them. But if that was all he could do for Bleidd, he would do it. He would show him that he loved him even through this struggle.

  *********************

  Allie turned her head towards the door as it creaked open and immediately regretted it as light flooded the room and blinded her. She closed her eyes and grimaced, flinching away from the doorway, but too late to save her vision. Looking down she blinked rapidly but all she could see were spots and flashes.

  Sal’s voice floated through the haze, as usual speaking Elvish. She didn’t think she’d ever heard him speak anything else. “You won’t be able to do any magic. You may as well not bother.”

  She glared in what she hoped was his direction blinking rapidly, replying in the same language, “And why can’t I?”

  She heard him sigh. If she squinted she could just make out a shadowy silhouette standing in the illuminated doorway. “Because you have a charm tied around your wrist that will deflect any magic you try doing.”

  Allie frowned, “That’s impossible, how can a charm stop magic from working?”

  “It doesn’t stop it,” Salarius said, patiently as if he were talking to a child. “It absorbs it. But while you’re wearing it you won’t be able to cast any spells. And the only one who can take it off is me, so don’t try that either.”

  Allie swallowed hard, trying not to let on how unnerved she was by this. Her vision was returning, although she still blinked away splashes of light, and she could see that it was Sal standing a few feet away by the door. She wanted to yell at him, to ask him why he was doing this, to hit him. Instead she sat in silence.

  After a minute he spoke again. “Do you need to relieve yourself?”

  Preferably on your shoe she thought but had the sense not to say. Not
until she had a better idea what was going on anyway. Instead she answered in the most neutral voice she could manage. “Yes.”

  He made no move to help her up so she struggled to stand on her own, her ankle protesting. She had only taken a single step though when he stopped her. “Where are your shoes?”

  She gestured with her chin towards her footwear. He frowned. “Why did you kick your shoes off?”

  “Because,” she gritted out, “I’m roasting in this coat and having my shoes off helped me cool down.”

  He sighed again, a sound that was already annoying her, then went over and picked her shoes up. She expected him to sit her back down and tell her to put her shoes back on, but he didn’t. Instead he grabbed her bound wrists with his free hand and pulled her out of the small room.

  She staggered after him and found herself in a wide room with a large hearth, counter, table and chairs, as well as several cabinets and shelves. I was in a storage room she thought to herself, looking at the shelves stocked with foodstuff pushed up against the nearest walls and realizing she must have been in the pantry which had been emptied out to hold her. The only other person in the room was a Fey woman; she had long blond hair and pointed ears, dark gold eyes, and was wearing a green dress that draped to the floor. Her hair looked slightly damp and the smell of goat was stronger out here, letting Allie guess that she was a Glaistig. Beneath that voluminous dress her body would be as much goat as woman, and she’d be as comfortable in water as on land. The water Fey were infamously mercurial and seeing this one, Allie wasn’t sure what to think.

  Sal tugged at her wrists pulling her further into the room towards the heavy kitchen table near the hearth. “Anna I need your help.”